Sex and Disability

Note: this is a growing field, with more resources being created all the time.  This list is neither comprehensive, nor particularly in depth in various directions.  I am simply attempting to provide a good starting point on various topics. As always suggestions are welcome. Continue reading


Resources: for abusers

This list is for people who want to help abusers stop being abusive and engage with their actions, for people who want to know if they are abusers and what to do about it. If you are or have been abused please read this list. If you are worried that you will become an abuser because you have been abused please read this list.

If you are concerned you may be abusive, some hotlines provide resources to help identify abusive behaviors both online and via their hotlines:

This site has pdfs, gender specific hotlines, and youth and Spanish language hotlines.

This hotline site has resources and guides.

For former abusers who are trying to improve:

This article as a good starting point.

This is a slightly older resource list.

Peer and community support can also be helpful.

Youth hotline

How to talk to a friend about their abusive behavior.

Feminist guide to accountability

Resources: the cycle of abuse

This resource is to dispel the myth that victims become abusers, and provide resources for people who are afraid that they may one day become abusive because of they are victims of abuse. For more resources if believe you may be being abused check out this post.  If you are worried that you might be an abuser or were an abuser in the past, check out this list.
Continue reading

Resources for unhealthy relationship

If you feel bad or unsafe, trust your instinct (it is probably right) and listen to your instinct (take steps to protect yourself).

The National Domestic Violence Hotline is 1-800-799-7233. Anyone can call anytime.
The website also has many resources, for friends and family, LGBT, immigration, abusers, etc.

Warning signs of an unhealthy relationship in several different languages:

Resources regarding abusers can be found at this list. Continue reading

Mental Health and Coping with Suicidal Ideation

This is a list of coping strategies.

The first focus is preventative strategies for people who experience chronic ideation regarding self harm, but can be used for any sort of negative experience.

Below is a list of resources for mental health self care that covers a variety of topics that may negatively affect one’s well being, as well as resources and information about seeking emergency care.  Each set of resources is labeled with an asterisk for improved navigation between sections.

Coping Strategies List
Planning Strategies List

List of resources

-Resources for friends and family
-Issue specific
-General resources

Please note I do not have any expertise and this is simply to help individuals who want to find resources on their own.  Thank you, to the collective wisdom of the online groups of Sick and Disabled Queers and Sick and Disabled Queers of Color, and continue to be an inclusive and supportive community. Continue reading

Questioning Gender

This article is for allies and trans people and most important people who are or are willing to question their gender.  Questioning gender is something everyone should do critically, with an awareness of how we are affected by the systems around us.

The devaluation of femininity, toxic masculinity, and restrictive gender roles hurt everyone.  Some of us find we can challenge these categories from within, and some of us find that the categories just don’t fit.

I think it’s so important to recognize that assigning people cis by default, and placing the onus on those of us who are not, makes it more difficult for us to exist as ourselves. Continue reading